The Shocking Truth: You’re the Source of Your Own Suffering
How to break FREE so you can create a life of peace, happiness, & satisfaction | NEXT LIVE MEDITATION 4/28 @ 7pm est
Hey friend!
Ever find yourself stuck in a cycle of negative thoughts & emotions, replaying a scenario or situation in your head over and over again to the point where you drive yourself crazy?
Do you also ever think back to mistakes you’ve made in the past, & still until this day you berate or judge yourself because of it?
And do you ever compare yourself unfavorably to others, wishing you could be where they are in life or have what they have, thinking you could never possibly achieve what they’ve achieved or be what they are?
What about people who’ve done you wrong? Do you find that you hold grudges against them?
If you can relate, you’re not alone. I’ve been there. I get it.
But now my question is — why is it like this?
Why do we let ourselves get to a point where we’re getting stuck in our heads, dwelling on the past, replaying scenarios, beating ourselves up for mistakes we’ve made, comparing our lives to others, holding onto grudges….
It’s exhausting and doing this to ourselves is only contributing to our overall sense of dissatisfaction & unhappiness.
This my friend, is what suffering looks like…& essentially we’re doing it to ourselves!
But now what if I told you— it didn’t have to be this way & that we have complete control over changing how we show up in our lives,
…would you believe me?
This is something I’ve been reflecting on lately.
And it’s incredible because what I’ve come to realize is that much of our suffering IS something we create ourselves.
I was noticing it in my own life.
I saw…and to my surprise…I recognized how most if not ALL of my suffering had been something I was keeping alive.
Ruminating on past mistakes was only leading me to feel shame, embarrassment, self doubt.
Continuously worrying about the future only fueled unnecessary stress & anxiety.
Comparing myself to others created feelings of envy, insecurity, low self esteem.
Holding on to grudges was poisoning my mind & heart because it was leading to ongoing feelings of anger & betrayal, preventing me from being able to fully move on and find closure.
And not only was I able to recognize it was me who was causing my own pain…
I recognized too, that no one was going to save me from me…other than ME.
It would have to be ME who faced the monsters that were in my head.
It would have to be ME doing the "inner" work to look at those things I didn't want to look at.
It would have to be ME who had to feel those things I didn't want to feel.
It would have to be ME who exposes what's in the dark so that I can see what was underneath it so that I can heal it.
This realization has become my guiding light & what has been helping to steer me towards reclaiming control over my life.
Instead of replaying old stories in my mind, comparing myself to others, beating myself up for past mistakes, and letting life continue to shit on me…
I made a conscious choice to embrace new thoughts, perspectives, and behaviors.
I decided to be the change.
I understand though that this realization may feel overwhelming for some.
The idea that we have the power to control the quality of our minds and lives can be…
…terrifying.
It may seem easier instead to wait for someone or something else to fix our problems, right?
But as the saying goes, "nothing changes if nothing changes."
And so in order for us to enact change, we must be willing to do the work, to show up for ourselves, and to listen to our inner voice.
We must be the ones to decide to heal ourselves.
Something you can try as soon as today to free yourself from what may be causing you suffering — is to practice self-compassion.
Practicing self-compassion involves treating oneself with kindness, understanding, and acceptance, especially during times of struggle or difficulty.
Here's a practical approach you can consider:
Today, whenever you notice yourself engaging in self-criticism, negative self-talk, or worry…
PAUSE!
& then offer yourself words of kindness and encouragement.
You can practice self-compassionate language such as, "It's okay to make mistakes; I'm only human," "I forgive myself for not being perfect." “I don’t have to entertain these thoughts, I can gift myself permission to shift my attention and focus onto something else.”
By starting here — where you’re choosing to consciously shift the way you speak to yourself, you can begin to create a more compassionate and supportive inner dialogue, which lays the foundation so that you can ultimately help yourself to alleviate self-induced suffering & lead to your own liberation.
JOIN OUR NEXT LIVE COMMUNITY MEDITATION!🧘🏻♀️🧘🏽♂️
Join me for our next LIVE community mindfulness meditation for inner peace on insight timer Sunday April 28th at 7pm est.